Lenore at 2 Months

Two Months Old

Her stats (from the doctor's office):

Weight: 14 pounds 4 ounces [96th percentile]

Length: 23.5 inches [89th percentile]

Head Size: 40.6 cm [97th percentile]

Everything looks pretty good this month. I did ask about her head shape because I thought she was favoring turning her head to one side. Sure enough, she's starting to get a flat spot, so we're going to try to encourage her to look the other way more often. The pediatrician said that her range of motion seems fine--she just seems to prefer turning her head the same direction most of the time (when laying, sleeping, etc.). She got one oral and two inject-able vaccines this time, and she's pretty fussy now that we're home (after an almost 4 hour nap). Hopefully this evening/overnight isn't too bad--tomorrow, we're off to Boise!

At our 1 month check-up, they found a heart murmur that had previously been undetected. Our pediatrician referred us to a pediatric cardiologist the next week. They ran a few tests and found that she has a 'very mild pulmonary stenosis' which is a thickening of the valve that regulates the blood flow from the heart to the lungs. She also has an ASD (Atrial Septal Defect), which are some extra holes in between the two atriums of her heart. The cardiologist said that both issues will go away on their own and that we don't need to worry about limiting her activities (e.g. crying) at this point. We'll go back for another check in six months. That week of waiting for the appointment was pretty worrisome, so we were very relieved to get good news.

What she's doing this month:

• She is back to swaddling! Sometime just after turning a month old, she started waking up shortly after we put her down (after 10-15 minutes). Kevin mentioned that maybe she was startling herself awake, to which I thought, 'Well, duh.' That's what the sleep book said when I read it with Lewis, but I'd forgotten. So now she's happily swaddled at night and sleeps pretty well. 
• She typically goes down between 9:30 and 10pm and wakes up once, around 3:30 or 4am. There was a week where she slept until 6am, but then that turned to 5:45, 5:15, 5, etc. and now it's 3:30 or 4am. I was having to get up with her for the day when it was in the 5:45-6am range (because she wasn't going back to sleep), but now (thankfully) she is going back down after the 3:30 or 4am wake-up and sleeping until a more reasonable 7 or 8am.
• She did just sleep until 6:15am this morning. We are going to Boise on Wednesday for a week (2 hours time difference), so I'm sure everything will be up in the air during and after that trip. So it goes.
• Our daily routine cycles are usually to eat, play, sleep, but we don't always follow that. I'm following her lead a lot more than I did with Lewis, watching for her cues more than watching the clock. I told my lactation consultant that I was trying to not let her go past three hours without eating during the day, and she told me I didn't need to do that (unless she gets past 4 hours). She said that 2-4 hour stretches between feedings could be 'normal' for her at this point, and that she's clearly getting enough to eat. It seemed like once I stopped waking her up from daytime naps to make sure she was eating, she started sleeping better overall. That could have just been a coincidence, but still. On her own, she's falling into a fairly predictable routine, so I'm not messing with it. She usually has one 4 hour stretch during the day, and then feeds closer to every 2 hours in the evenings.
• She is smiling and laughing and cooing sometimes when we talk to her, which is just the sweetest sound. I don't really remember Lewis being quite as ooshy gooshy as she is (that's a technical term). :) She's just really sweet.
• She LOVES Kevin. She usually lights up when she's with him (which is quite a contrast from the first month, when their time together [evenings] was full of fussiness).
• I'm still sucking at doing tummy time, but her head control is pretty good, I think. I will do better this month.
• She loves to try to stand and bounce on our laps, and we'll probably bring up the jumperoo sometime soon.
• She is pretty close to outgrowing her 3 month clothes, though she is swimming in some of her 3-6 month ones. Separates seem to fit her better than one-pieces right now, I guess.

Now onto breastfeeding...

• Breastfeeding is still not going well. It's going, just not well. She is obviously fine and gaining weight, but she is hurting me in the process. I usually have pain at latch-on, sometimes pain during a feed, and always pain after a feed.
• Going way back to week 2, we thought it was thrush, but it's not thrush.
• A few weeks after that, they diagnosed me with Raynaud's (lack of blood flow to extremities due to cold or stress). At first they told me to just try to keep warm (during a record low cold snap). My LC was able to help me get a medication prescribed (nifedipine) by my OB's office, but unfortunately that didn't help, either.
• I was finally able to separate the pain and distinguish that the worst/lingering pain was due to a shallow latch rather than Raynaud's (they're two different pains, occurring at two different times). The Raynaud's happens when I'm cold (which is great timing, since winter has just begun). Once I was able to separate the two, I went back to my LC to try to work on latch again, sometime after Thanksgiving.
• Fast forward a few weeks, and we're still having issues. We went back last week, and my LC checked Lenore's mouth to make sure that there wasn't any tongue tie (and there isn't). She did notice that she has a very sensitive gag reflex. My LC thinks that she is pushing my nipple out of her mouth as I attempt to get it further back in there for a proper latch. That results in her nursing off the end of my breast rather than where she's *supposed* to, which causes the continual damage to my nipples (because they are hitting the hard palate instead of the soft palate). Because of that rubbing on the hard palate, my nipples keep getting damaged and have vasospasms (a constriction of blood flow) after feedings (throbbing, burning, stinging, etc.). It is the most horrible pain--it usually happens 5-15 minutes after a feeding and lasts 5 minutes or so. Sometimes it crosses my whole chest, deep in the tissue.
• My LC also mentioned that I just have large, full breasts (duh and duh), and that it will make it harder for her to get a good latch. What I'm supposed to do about that, I don't know.
• I have googled my eyes out and watched 'how to' videos and consulted my books, and it seems I'm doing everything to the best of my ability. We are just not grooving (yet).
• SO, having said all of that, I'm going to ask the pediatrician about the gag reflex tomorrow at our 2 month check-up. The LC said that it could possibly lead to issues when it comes to starting solids, but she isn't sure if that's what's causing the issues with feeding now. I don't know if the pediatrician would recommend doing any sort of therapy now to see if that would improve breastfeeding, but I am willing to try anything at this point.
• In other words, breastfeeding sucks. Ba-dum-ching! :) [Slightly jealous kudos to all of those mamas who have a natural and blissful relationship with it.] Talking to my friends, now, I'm learning that a lot of them have had a difficult go at it, and it's good to know I'm not alone. I remember having a few issues with Lewis early on, but they were resolved in one session with a LC. I would say I had a very easy time after that, but there's been nothing easy about it this time. I keep reading that maybe she'll outgrow it around 2 months (which would be any day now!), and I'm hoping that's the case. Otherwise, we'll see how long I can put up with the pain. I can't just quit, either, because that would be a hell unto itself with engorgement pain. I'd need to taper off over a few weeks and either pump or formula-feed, and it is 'easier' to just breastfeed. I have tried taking breaks for entire days by just pumping, but the time it takes to pump, plus feed, plus wash bottles and pump parts, is a lot, especially when I'm by myself and also taking care of Lewis. So I don't know what the right answer is for us right now. Certainly, to be continued.

And now some more pictures, to end on a happy note:

 She's got cheeks for days. :)

 Yea, my brother loves me.

 I think she's got the look-of-love for her brother, too.

My babies. :)