What I'm Digging

As an ode to Young House Love Has a Podcast, I'm writing a What I'm Digging post. Randomness abounds, but we've had a lot of happenings around here lately. This was started about a month ago, so things have actually changed since then, which I will explain in a new post.


Facebook of Today Sucks
I wish I could hide all political/religious/etc. posts and just get back to babies and puppies.

I can still remember years ago when there were other heated discussions going around, and I lost friends over it. I remember thinking, 'How can someone so openly express their feelings for all to see?' Didn't their parents teach them that some things were best kept to themselves? Along with, 'God, I don't even know that person/morally oppose that person/etc.'

I want to say, 'Just. Shut. Up.' to everyone.


So Much Pee
aka Lenore is Potty Training
aka Peter is in Early Liver Failure
aka Lewis was Sick
That was short-lived. Lenore decided to potty train one day, which I knew she would. We started on a Monday, and I sent her to school Wednesday and Thursday of that week in underwear. Wednesday, she held it until the end of her three hours until she had an accident. Thursday, she went through three pairs of underwear/pants due to accidents. By Friday, I decided we were back to diapers. Once this case runs out, I am changing to Pull-ups because they are easier to get on/off given our current situation. She will go pee by herself when she needs to, but she still doesn't poop in the toilet. She is wearing a diaper for now and pretty much keeping it dry all day (except nap and overnight and except for poop).

Peter is still in liver failure, but it's not as serious as I thought it was. I thought he was going to have to be put down the week we found out, but steroids have improved things (while also making him pee all over the house for a few weeks there). He's tapering off the steroids now, and I think he knows that we will let him out 2x as often as our normal, so his accidents have stopped (thank God). We go back in two more weeks to recheck his values and see if we can taper the steroids further. He's always had liver issues, but this was different. He wasn't eating much for about a month, so we've switched his food to a lower protein one (to make things easier for his liver to digest) and the steroids have helped him perk up. He's also on an antioxidant to help rejuvenate the part of the liver that was failing, and he's on two medicines to protect his stomach from ulcers (caused by the steroids). So, four medicines for the old boy. I'm lucky to remember to give them half the time, but he still seems to be fine.

Lewis was sick a few weeks ago and took a nap on Kevin on the couch (unheard of for the past 2+ years). As he napped, Lewis PEED ON KEVIN AND THE COUCH. (I first thought he said he'd just sat in it, but Kevin corrected the details for me.) 

So Kevin was covered in pee, and the couch smelled for a few days while it was being cleaned and drying out. I threw my jacket in the laundry that same night of Lewis/Kevin's couch/pee incident, only to quickly retrieve it to go out for a drink with a friend. As I got to the destination, I realized I was covered in pee from my jacket laying on top of  a kitchen rug that Peter had just peed on.

Pee. Every. Where.


Working
I enjoy working. I don't know that I necessarily can handle being with little ones all morning and then coming home to my little ones for the afternoon/evening, but I do appreciate the freeing up that working has provided me. Before, it felt like everything fell on me because I was the one who was home and that was my job (which it certainly was). Now that I work three mornings a week, things are being divided and that unspoken burden has really been relieved. I'm so lucky to have Kevin to share in this crazy adventure of parenting. To be continued...

Books, Books, Books

I got three new books for my birthday from my extremely well-read, older, and wiser sister, with a note. Something to the effect of, "Thought you might like to read something other than baby books.' I didn't realize how much I appreciated getting my mind taken away from what can be the doldrums of breastfeeding every couple of hours all day long. Or something to do while snuggling a sleeping baby, too. Rather than check my phone again to see that (still) nothing is happening in the outside world. 

I took those books down to my bookcase after they arrived for my birthday last week, which is *all* the way downstairs, where I don't always venture. On Christmas, Kevin got me four more books, so I started reading them right away, since they were right in front of me. I will move on to Emily's selections next.

I read Amy Poehler's book (Yes Please) in less than 24 hours which is highly unlike me. I usually get gung-ho for like a chapter or maybe 30 pages. But 375 pages? In a day? [Too bad I couldn't be as interested in my English lit assignments in college.] I love Amy. And I love Tina Fey. I'm now halfway through her book (Bossypants) at about the 12 hour mark so maybe I'll wrap it up by tomorrow. 

UPDATE: I did finish Tina's book within 24 hours and moved along to Lena Dunham's, which I also finished under a day. 3 books, 3 days. If I achieve nothing else these next few days while Kevin is off, I will have read more books than the entire past year! That's both encouraging and pathetic. I have read my fair share of news articles and People magazine (and Parents and Martha Stewart Living and This Old House) over the year, of course.

I really liked Amy and Tina's books because they not only tell about their upbringing and how they've come to be, but they touch on relevant-to-me topics such as babies and breastfeeding, and I appreciate their lightness and wisdom at this particular time (minute, hour, day) in my life.

Lena's book was about how I expected it to be, just as she is. I don't love her, but I do find her interesting.

And I've finally taken the plunge into the smartphone world, as of a few weeks ago. My old phone had been superglued together twice and has had unbelievably crappy reception from day one, so it was time. I am slowly figuring out how to use Blogger on there (thanks for the inspiration, Keith), but I'm not quite there yet. I started this post on my phone but had to finish on the laptop. Maybe one of these days I'll figure out how to add pictures (wow!) and be more succinct (yea right!) for maximum phone blogging success. We shall see. I make no promises. :)

Oh, and the 4th book from Kevin is Wild.

Naming Baby

Coming up with a name was so much more difficult for us this time, for whatever reason! We finally finalized our decisions over dinner at 38 weeks (and I made shirts to make them official):

The shirt was a bit snug on my big girl. :)

 #size0to3months #thinkagain 

Enough pictures, already! Feed me, woman!

The final decision was: Crosby Pete for a boy or Lenore Elaine for a girl.

Lenore Elaine
I've liked Lenore since we were pregnant with Lewis. I've seen it as Lenore, Leonore, Lenora, Elenore, Eleanora, etc. but I just like plain ol' Lenore.

• Meaning is 'Like a Lion' or 'Light, Torch, Bright.'
• I didn't initially realize it, but it's a form of Leona, which was my great-grandmother Webb's name.
• I don't know about a nickname, yet. I've heard Nori, but I don't think I can nickname my child the same as Kim Kardashian. :) I'd liked Leni years ago, but I've since gone away from that (and Kevin is very anti-Leni, so that was part of our agreement). :) I think we'll just stick with Lenore for now.
• We like how that it starts with an L, to go along with Lewis: Lewis and Lenore.

Elaine was Kevin's suggestion--he really likes Julia Louis Dreyfus, especially as Elaine Benes on Seinfeld. It was a first name contender for a while, but we decided to use it as a middle instead. And, an added reason, if you take the letters of my sister's name (Emily Diane) and put them in a letter blender, it kind of makes the name, Elaine. :)

Crosby Pete
Kevin is the one who suggested Crosby, and we both liked it for a number of reasons, even more so as time went on and we thought more about it.

• Meaning is 'Dweller by the town crossing.'
• Crosby Braverman (Dax Shepherd) from Parenthood, one of our favorite shows.
• Bing Crosby is in White Christmas, which is one of my (and my mom's and maybe my sister's?) favorite movies. I watch it every year as I put up the Christmas tree. My sister and I once did the Haynes' sisters' Sisters routine in a high school choir performance (because we are awesome). We go way back. :)
• Songs of Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young have been with me, growing up, and with us, throughout our relationship. 
• Our House and Teach Your Children remind me of my childhood, hearing my parents sing around the house.
• Suite: Judy Blue Eyes is just a great song. 
• Kevin really likes Southern Cross.
• One of the absolute most fun days of my life was back in the summer of 2003 at Taste of Bloomington with Kevin and my sister and a friend, eating good food, drinking good beer, and dancing the conga line to Love the One You're With (covered by the band Bahama Llama). [Kevin would like to note that it's technically just a Stephen Stills song, not CSN/Y, but we still associate it with CSN/Y.]
• David Crosby has 'most awesome' hair, and given the crazy waves/curls between Kevin and I, we figure this child is bound to have some awesome hair, too.
• We like that it's two syllables, like Lewis, and we like the shortened version, Cros: Lew and Cros.

We went with Pete because, why not? We thought of using many other names and really went through the ringer with them, but we ultimately decided that Lewis Pete and Crosby Pete sounded right to us. Waycross (the source of the Jim Peters' story and Peter's namesake) is what brought us together, so we decided to just go with it.


So those are/were our names! I really, truly thought it was going to be a boy, based on how the pregnancy felt compared to Lewis' (very similar), but I had started to feel a greater connection to the name, Lenore, towards the end (and I told a few people that in the days leading up to the baby's arrival).

Mother's Day Weekend

On Saturday morning, Lewis and I headed out to the forest where I used to work for a Woodland Tea Party. A former co-worker/friend had planned it, so I thought it would be fun for Lewis and I to have a special Mama/Lew date. It was pouring rain overnight and into the morning, but we headed on out (and the rain eventually did stop):

Ready for Tea (and moreso, cookies)

 Listening to instructions before the hike (in some light rain)

 A box turtle in the middle of the trail

 At first avoiding puddles, but that would soon change :)

I think the rain or the walking-while-taking-a-picture made this so crazy/trippy/blurry. You'll notice there's no sign of the rest of the group in front of us. About 5 minutes into the hike, I could tell it was going to be too much for Lew to handle. They stopped a lot and talked about wildflowers (which was great for mothers and other non-toddler types, of course), but I wanted to slip away and go back to the building. We stuck with it and made it out, pretty much unscathed (just a little frazzled for Mama).

Just as we were exiting the woods and heading back to the building, Lew found a pretty sweet puddle to do some stomping in:

 Have your fun, buddy.

We then detoured to the car to change into the back-up jeans I'd packed. :) In addition to the water here, he'd slipped a couple of times on the trail and gotten a muddy booty and muddy knees.

Ready for tea (he looks less than enthused, but I think it was because we were seated with strangers). I'd been trying to keep him away from the dessert table from the moment we arrived. The tables were pretty formal (read: lots of breakable items), so I had to clear away an area for him: 

Going in for a cookie.

He didn't end up eating most of the treats, unfortunately (he wanted to go and play). They were delicious--they were from a local, natural bakery (Cake Flour) and the tea was from Hillbilly Tea here in town.

While he was playing, Christa (my friend) found him and got him started on a little gift for the mothers. They made a photo mat with various leaves and other bits from the woods: 

It's drying up already, but it's a sweet little memento.

(They took our picture and printed it for us, too.)

After finishing his craft, I realized he'd had an accident, so I decided we would head out a little early. I was also having trouble getting him to stay in one place and walk carefully (again, lots of breakables!). He'd had some late nights leading up to that morning, so it all seemed to culminate in a very fussy Lewis by the end of it. Overall, though it was a nice event, and I'm glad we went.

Along with the late nights, he has been waking up earrrrly the past week or two (which has improved the last few mornings, thanks to some earlier bedtimes). This was my wake-up crew on Mother's Day at like 6:45am. :) The dogs were there all night--the child thought they could use some extra snuggles:

 The crazy iPhone flashes in the dark made Lew's eyes close.

Looks like Lewis and Kevin did some snuggling while I was away that day, too: 

 My two favorite boys :)

And one dirty foot

On Sunday morning, I got up and made a big breakfast for Kevin, Lewis, and me (because I wanted to...Kevin offered). Kevin took Lewis to see Grandma Sharon while I stayed at the house and almost finished the season of Sex and the City I've been binge-watching (for like the 3rd time). :) I then went and met Sharon and Kevin's aunt and cousins for lunch and a movie. When I got home, Kevin was starting dinner--he made steak, twice-baked potato casserole (one of my favorite foods ever), Caesar salad, and a peanut butter/Butterfinger pie. What a guy! It was such a nice day.  

[Sorry I didn't get to see you, Mom!! Of course the day would have been better if we'd been able to spend some time with you, but hopefully next year.]

Resolutions

Some resolutions for the new year:

Complain Less and/or Do More to Change Things Within my Control
I've been trying to do this the past few months and will try to continue. I had a couple of reflective days this fall and realized just how much I complain! Instead, I'm trying to do something about it. Most things truly are within my control, so it feels nice to see little changes happening. 

Read More Books
Which I guess could also be 'Read less celebrity gossip websites, Facebook, CNN, etc.' The mindless internet time waste is such a waste, and I forgot how much I really like to read. I still have about 10 parenting books I should read, but I forgot how nice it is to read something I really want to read. I'm in the middle of Mindy Kaling's book right now and laughing out loud a lot. I need more of that! I have shelves of books downstairs that I've, at some point, wanted to read enough to buy them (for 50 cents at Goodwill, at least)--I need to get on that.

Do More for Others 
I've been doing some volunteer park restoration work since Fall 2012, and that has been a nice dip back into my 'old' life, doing outdoor work I enjoy and getting to know people with interests similar to mine. It requires me to get Kevin or Kevin's parents to watch Lewis, though, so that sometimes is more hassle than it's worth. (I'm very thankful to them, of course.) I'm going to try to continue that work this spring, and I might look for something that Lewis can help with. I know that some places have age restrictions, so we might not be able to do much yet.

Do More, In General
It's hard on some days to feel like I'm accomplishing much of anything as a stay-at-home-mom (other than raising a good kid, I hope). It's just so different from a 9-5 job where you have a to-do list, you accomplish things, you get feedback from a boss, etc. 
It's hard for me to feel good about cleaning a bathroom, for instance. [Though some days I think I should receive an award for cleaning a bathroom with a toddler trying to play in said bathroom at the same time, without losing my mind.] :)
I think what I mean is that I want to do more things that have meaning to me. For example, I enjoy making things, so I should make more things. Something like that. :) In addition to my 'job' of keeping the house clean-ish.

Work to Improve Daily Routine
Almost 3 years in, now, our daily routine is pretty set. There are still a few areas where we get caught up sometimes and have troubles, though...like at the end of the day when I'm trying to make dinner. I need to do a better job of thinking ahead and doing some prep work ahead of time, when needed. I enjoy cooking, but I also need to save some of the more complicated recipes for the weekends when Kevin is here to help with Lewis. 

A Food (and Drink) Revolution Is In Order

Those who know me well know that I am a person who likes to be in control. I appreciate certain societal norms (How to Be a Person a la Liz Lemon if you watch 30 Rock--I tried to find a video clip but couldn't...I think it was the first episode back from the winter break, episode 608). I also appreciate moderation, not an extreme one way or the other (in everything--driving, walking, eating, religion, politics, etc.). I could probably write out procedures on the way I go about my daily life. I appreciate consistency, knowing what to expect, etc. (with the occasional spontaneous moment thrown in from time to time to keep things exciting). 


In motherhood, that translates into finding what works and then molding it to make it happen as efficiently as possible (and doing pretty much the same thing over and over again). For me, I planned out Lewis' meals to include 1/4 c. of this and 1/2 c. of that to ensure that he got the daily recommended amounts of each of the food groups. That was working very well for us. Lewis ate like a champ. I (We) felt good about Lewis having a varied, balanced diet. Life was good.


Knowing all of this, what a shock it has been this past week for Lewis to reject 80% of the 'normal' food that we've been giving him for months now. My thoughts have been something like, "Well, shit, what is he going to eat now?" Like no other food exists. Like it's the end of the world as we know it. Somewhat of a panic. Major frustration. Like OMG, he'll only eat Goldfish and Twinkies from now through eternity. (Not that he's ever experienced a Twinkie.)


I should also note that I accept change about as quickly as the Grand Canyon changes (first thing I could think of that changes very slowly). :) Aaaand, geology rocks. :) 


Anyway, we are in for a food revolution here at our house. It seems as though he is very anti-anything-on-a-spoon as well as very anti-vegetable. He had been happily eating a Cereal/Fruit/Yogurt puree (by spoon) at breakfast, cottage cheese (by spoon) at lunch, and a Cereal/Veggie/Meat puree (by spoon) at dinner. In addition, we put fruit, vegetables, cheese, cheerios, pasta, etc. on his tray to feed himself.


[And I'm sure it's just a phase and we'll have to keep trying and that he'll eventually come back around, but it's been a lot of refusals, all at once. And it has sent me into a bit of a tailspin.]


So a little Hot and Not comparison:

HOT

• Animal Crackers
• Blueberries (as well as Blackberries, Raspberries, and Strawberries)
• Cheerios
• Cheese (diced string cheese and shredded cheddar)
• Goldfish
• Grapes [which is awesome because they are less $$ than blueberries, and I can quarter one grape (for safety) and turn it into four little grapelets]
• Mandarin Oranges
• Pasta
• Pears
• Pineapple
• Squeeze pouches of fruits/veggies (I had some in the cabinet that I'd bought for traveling a few weeks ago and tried one out yesterday, and he loved it. He tried to suck the fruit/veggies out rather than squeeze, so I had to help, but I think he liked being able to hold it. However, they are $$.)

NOT

• Carrots
• Corn
• Cottage Cheese (because it's on a spoon)
• Green Beans
• Parsnips
• Pasta/Vegetables/Meat/Cheese (as a cheese-y/melt-y 'casserole')
• Peas
• Sweet Potatoes
• Yogurt (because it's on a spoon)

Conclusions and Notes of Interest

Needs More Vegetables
So now that I've listed them out, I see the huge disparity between fruits and vegetables! I guess that's not so bad (at least it's not ALL Goldfish)--I just need to figure out a way to get him to take in more vegetables. I'm going to try broccoli and cauliflower because he has loved those in the past. The sprinkle-it-with-cheese method failed the other day, but I can keep trying.


Protein
I also need to work on getting him to take in more protein--the meat puree we mixed in at dinner was really convenient, but I can plan ahead and boil up some chicken. I'm going to see how he likes hard-boiled eggs. He is kind of 50/50 on beans. Tuna got a big thumbs down. He does love peanut butter, but I only give him a little as a thin coating on toast. I guess he gets some protein from his milk and cheese.


Fruit
I also had a dilemma when shopping for canned fruits...do I want No Sugar Added, In Light Syrup, or what?? I decided the artificial sweetener in the No Sugar Added varieties was probably worse than the real sugar in the In Light Syrup ones, but I still rinsed the fruit to avoid giving him the extra sugar. NOW, in the past few weeks, I'm excited to see that one of the major brands (either Dole or Del Monte, I forget) has come out with In 100% Juice varieties AND, even better, Target's store brand has, too. SO, In 100% Juice, it is. Or whole fruit, of course, if the fruit is soft enough.


I Will Not Be a Short-Order Cook
He is really good at picking out what he likes and doesn't like out of the mix. I sprinkle everything onto his tray (veggies, pasta, cheese, fruit, etc.), and he will very carefully pluck out only the foods he wants to eat. Sneaky sneaky.


I need to find the line between making food that he likes and will eat and not being a short-order cook. I guess I should keep offering him a variety and hope that his tastes come back. I feel like if I let him 'get his way' now on refusing foods, he'll continue to be picky and 'get his way' later on. I obviously can't force feed him, but I also want him to eat a balanced diet. I was just reading in Parenting magazine this morning where they suggested serving things with dip to make them more enticing, so maybe I will try that--vegetables and ranch, quesadilla and sour cream, berries and yogurt, etc. It might just take me awhile to make the adjustments.


And, Lastly, Drink
I declared an unofficial War on Sippy Cups a few weeks ago, a quest to find one that was leak, drip, and chew-proof. I am happy to report that I have declared a winner. For milk, the Munchkin Mighty Grip Spill-Proof Cup. For water, the Tommee Tippee Explora Truly Spill-Proof Water Bottle (these names, they assume so much). :) While they all claim to be spill proof, they are not all chew-proof. I was using the Nuby Super Spout Easy Gripper, but that 'super' spout was also super chewable and Lew destroyed 4 of them over the past few weeks. He finally destroyed the last this week, so we are free of them.


Sorry to go on and on. This really has thrown me (us) into a tailspin. Like, "Whoa, there! What have you done with our Happy Little Eating Machine?" I'm sure by next week, we will have a whole new set of food issues. Until then, I'm off to whip up a new, fantastic lunch for Lew. :)

A Quote

I came across this a few weeks ago and just wanted to post:

If I had my child to raise all over again,

I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.

I'd finger-paint more, and point the finger less.

I would do less correcting and more connecting.

I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.

I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.

I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.

I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.

I'd do more hugging and less tugging.

- Diane Looman


I, of course, like the part about running through more fields and gazing at more stars. And just taking a step back, in general.

A New Year - Happy 2012!

Happy 2012, all!


A few goals for the new year:

• Implement more structured activities into Lewis' day. Plan ahead. Utilize the activity books we have.
• Eat more whole foods and less 'convenience' foods. Make more from scratch. Expand our weeknight dinner repertoire. Try menu planning. Buy/eat more fruits and vegetables.
• Take time every day for myself. Maybe walk the dogs after Kevin gets home. Maybe yoga. Something where I can step away from Lewis, away from the TV/computer, and clear my head.

Things could soon get turned upside down at our house! I have applied for a full-time Naturalist position out at the forest where I worked for three seasons. I wasn't really looking for something full-time, but this job has been on my closest-to-a-dream-job radar for a few (7 or so) years, so I feel like I owe it to myself to at least apply. 


While trying to live in the moment, I can't help but try to lay down plans now that will put me in the best scenario 5+ years from now (once we are finished having children). I'm concerned that having no degree-related year-round, full-time job experience on my resume will set me back some. My thinking is that if I can get a few years of entry level experience now with this forest position, I can take off from work again for a while with the next child. When I am ready to return to work again, I will be able to enter the workforce in more of an established role instead of something entry level. 


Plus, now that Lewis is older and more interactive, I want him to have the benefits of being around other children. I feel like we could do that through a mom group/play group (or storytime and swim lessons and other planned activities on my part), or we could send him to daycare.


I was starting to think about looking for a part-time job (until the forest job came up), and I'm very much torn on what the 'right' thing to do is. My considerations are Lewis' needs vs. my career vs. stress level vs. financial security vs. time to myself vs. family balance.


I love Lewis so much, and I just want to do what is right for him and for me, whatever that is. I'm very fortunate to be in a situation of having a choice, I realize.


So I guess that's another resolution:

• To achieve better balance.

We'll see what happens!